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<channel>
	<title>Mirrored Reflections &#187; grief</title>
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	<link>http://cordiebw.com</link>
	<description>Spiritual Revelations for Humans Seeking Humanity in Humans ~CordieB.</description>
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		<title>The Grief Process</title>
		<link>http://cordiebw.com/2008/12/02/the-grief-process/</link>
		<comments>http://cordiebw.com/2008/12/02/the-grief-process/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 03 Dec 2008 00:00:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Cordie B</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Observations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[acceptance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bargaining]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bargaining depression acceptance]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[black on black crime]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[black-one-black crime]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[death]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[denial]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Depression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dispair]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[eternity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[god]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[grief]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[grieving]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[heal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[healing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jamal Harrison]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jamal Holland]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loss of child]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lost]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mothers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[poem]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Poetry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[stages of grief]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[violence]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[youth]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://cordieb.wordpress.com/?p=820</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This was very hard to write for me; as there is no greater loss that I can imagine than that of the loss of a child. Yet it happens; more often than we want to admit . . .So often people guilty because they are told they must move on . . . yet healing [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This was very hard to write for me; as there is no greater loss that I can imagine than that of the loss of a child. Yet it happens; more often than we want to admit . . .So often people guilty because they are told they must move on . . . yet healing requires grief and time. Those who intend to bring comfort must understand these cycles too. So I write this for anyone who may be going through such despair. . . and I pray that you find joy one sweet day. . .<br />
<a href="http://cordieb.deviantart.com/art/RIP-Jamal-102596033"></a></p>
<p><a><img class="alignnone" src="http://th06.deviantart.com/fs35/300W/f/2008/308/3/1/RIP_Jamal_by_cordieb.png" alt="" width="300" height="200" />  </a><br />
There are five stages of grief; and most people experience grief in the order stated below. . .</p>
<p><strong>Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance</strong></p>
<h3>Grief&#8217;s Cycle &#8230;By CordieB</h3>
<p>I don&#8217;t believe what&#8217;s happening;</p>
<p>Surely this can not be real</p>
<p>I&#8217;ll awaken from this nightmare soon</p>
<p>I&#8217;ll see, I&#8217;ll touch, I&#8217;ll feel . . .</p>
<p>your loving eyes; your tender heart</p>
<p>You..are still here! No!</p>
<p>We are not apart!</p>
<p>Oh God why did you take my love&#8230;.</p>
<p>Such a loving soul was he</p>
<p>If you were such a loving God</p>
<p>Why allow such tragedy?</p>
<p>This world is filled with such despair</p>
<p>What does it mean, who really cares?</p>
<p>There are no answers to eternity</p>
<p>If only you would just take me&#8230;</p>
<p>instead; I&#8217;d rather be the one -</p>
<p>Please take me God, release my son&#8230;</p>
<p>Just leave me be. . . let me be free</p>
<p>Into my solo destiny</p>
<p>Alone ..through misty haze I see &#8211; and want to be</p>
<p>No desire to communicate -</p>
<p>I&#8217;ve lost my will; such is my fate&#8230;</p>
<p>Why is it that he had to die?</p>
<p>I plead, I beg, I must know why&#8230;</p>
<p>My heart&#8217;s so cold; ice cycled blood I cry . . .</p>
<p>Such agony; I hate- despise&#8230;</p>
<p>I can not pray . . my heart still cries</p>
<p>I can&#8217;t imagine going on . . .</p>
<p>without my loving, caring son . . .</p>
<p>Time passes by; seems like a distant dream</p>
<p>I cry sometimes&#8230;.</p>
<p>yes, with time &#8230;the sadness weans</p>
<p>and with each day as life goes on&#8230;</p>
<p>Your love; it helps me carry on</p>
<p>I miss you still, so much &#8211; yet I fear</p>
<p>I&#8217;ll lose your vision through the years. . .</p>
<p>Yet memories remain so rich and clear</p>
<p>I feel your love down in my soul</p>
<p>Memories bring me comfort; love keeps me whole</p>
<p>My God holds me each day, each hour</p>
<p>So wondrous is God&#8217;s healing power</p>
<p>I don&#8217;t have answers to this life . . .</p>
<p>Yet live I must, through peace or strife</p>
<p>as death&#8217;s essential to all life</p>
<p>And though I do not understand</p>
<p>I see a glimpse of life again</p>
<p>And I feel so blessed to be the one&#8230;</p>
<p>you chose to be your mother, Son.</p>
<p>~Written for Valeria Harrison, Mother of Jamal, for which I wrote an article recently, entitled <a href="http://cordieb.wordpress.com/2008/11/03/lessons-from-the-hood-perhaps-you-can-find-it-im-tired/">Lessons from the Hood &#8211; Perhaps you can find it; I&#8217;m tired</a> .&quot;   Valeria read that post . . . and commented. . . .let us keep her in our prayers and pray that men will lay their weapons down!</p>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>An Early Rejection Usually Saves You From a Great Deal of Pain, Grief, and Heartache in the Long Run</title>
		<link>http://cordiebw.com/2008/01/18/an-early-rejection-usually-saves-you-from-a-great-deal-of-grief-in-the-long-run/</link>
		<comments>http://cordiebw.com/2008/01/18/an-early-rejection-usually-saves-you-from-a-great-deal-of-grief-in-the-long-run/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 18 Jan 2008 21:17:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Cordie B</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Humanity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Observations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Spirituality]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[creator]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[grief]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[heartache]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lost love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pain]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[peace]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rejection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[relationships]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://cordieb.wordpress.com/2008/01/18/an-early-rejection-usually-saves-you-from-a-great-deal-of-grief-in-the-long-run/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[No one likes or desires rejection.  However, an early rejection usually saves you from a great deal of pain, grief, and heartache, in the long run.  There are also those times when what you have is not really what you want, but you convince yourself that it is what you need, and you settle.  Well, if the other person [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>No one likes or desires rejection.  However, an early rejection usually saves you from a great deal of pain, grief, and heartache, in the long run.  There are also those times when what you have is not really what you want, but you convince yourself that it is what you need, and you settle.  Well, if the other person rejects you, guess what! you are saved from having to run away yourself!  Rejection is most traumatic when you start out in the relationship feeling needy, have a possessive need to be loved, or are in the relationship for material things.  When you enter a relationship feeling needy and unfulfilled, rejection can feel devestating, because you never got the chance to really love and appreciate your own selfworth.   In those situations you must not become withdrawn or feel hopeless.   First, you must realize that your creator will not keep anything in your life that is not for your good.  This rejection  could have occurred to teach you a life lesson or give you another perspective on life.  Next, ask yourself, what is it that this person has that is so great, and why is it you don&#8217;t think you can get it anywhere else.  If you understand that you can only draw to yourself that which is a reflection of yourself, you will begin to see rejection in another light.  If you still do not fully love and appreciate your self worth, you will surely draw the same type of relationship issues back to you again.    When you enter any relationship, you should be and feel the best you can about your self and your life.  If you get rejected, it could  very well be that you have to work on self a little bit more, and that includes loving yourself so that you only draw to you what&#8217;s worthy of you. </p>
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