Love, Fear and Enlightenment ~CordieB.

She gazed upon his deep brown eyes
Glaized with love and fear; confused yet wise
she knew he loved her desperately . . . .
he could not risk her flying free

She knew she loved him through all fate
with him she’d found her mirrored mate
but with his love came blind control
Though undeliberate, such control shackled her soul

She knew her love was full and true
but there were other things she also knew . . .
she knew she could not be contained
into the life for which he’d planned

She knew he had insecurities
that would never allow her to simply be
he’d always possess the fear of flight
of her souring endlessly into the night

But since her love was true and tried
she eased his fears; stayed by his side
dealt with his subtle controls of will
convinced his way was better still

In time she lost desire to feel . . .

the warmth of the glowing sun
the coolness of the rain upon
her gentle being which she’d dreamed of
she’d traded peace of mind for love . . .

but still the longing in her eyes
revealed a tale of silent cries
this only hightend his insecurites
gave way to anger; raged immaturities
he’d often, confused, demand her to leave
but she’d hold to her sweet reprieve . . .

then one blessed day so crystal clear
the god’s of earth’s great atmosphere
gave strength to follow the raged command
thus she left the home of her beloved man
which she had humorously dubbed the promise land

though she knew his words were those of fear
the god’s gave her insight true and clear
that though her love was tried and true
living that life again; she she could not do

she needed the ability to shed her tears
to speak or write her words without the fears
of disillusioned, often drunken anger
for which she feared might trigger danger

But still her love so pure remained
Yet her peace of mind was hence regained
she knew she really loved this man
but feared rejection and anger once again . . .

She bathed in sweet tranquilities
she felt she finally could breath
she missed his presense even so . . .
Yet there was a stranger she had to get to know

She needed to get to know herself
not live her life for someone else
she needed to live her own desires
find out what really sparked her fires

Again, her love was tried and true
but being alone was something she needed to do
she’d always ran from man to man
if one doesn’t work out; another one can
was often her motto for many years
so in fact she had never faced her inner fears
thus she found herself crying the same sad tears

She felt if she simply returned for love
the same problems would arise in time thereof
for although she loved him beyond compare
she knew she’d lost a part of self somewhere . . .

Ah yes! she loved him desperately
and felt there love was meant to be
but with raw emotions and fear intertwined
she risked loosing his love to find her mind

To be continued. . . .

~By CordieB

“Remove those ‘I want you to like me’ stickers from your forehead and, instead, place them where they truly will do the most good — on your mirror!” ~ Susan Jeffers

With that I felt impelled to repost my theme poem, Mirror of My Soul!   So, take that sticker off your forehead today!

~~~~~~~

Mirror of My Soul ~CordieB

Looking through the mirror into the window of my soul

I see a floating being, with stories yet untold

I see a bouncing baby and a woman turning old

I see a heart so full of warmth, yet at times so bitter cold

Looking through the mirror into the window of my being

I see a woman whose lived her life as though she were sightseeing

Who never truly embraced the world with zest of fearless flight

Who carefully lived each day in surety she’d sleep through another night

And awaken to the dawn; weary eyes appearing bright

Reaching into the mirror to grasp a clear vision of myself

I grasped a fleeting spirit, that nearly took my breath

She hauntingly laughed at me; wicked laughter laced with fear

She cursed me as a liar, all was not as it appeared

She said I was like an empty house; no personality of its own

My inhabitants, friends and lovers, often made this house their home

I changed my personality to fit the status quo

My decor changed with each owner, and disappeared once they would go

I could not grasp this entity, although she was so close and clear

Each time I thought I had her, she’d up and disappear

And then someone would magically arrive with the gift of identity

So for a time I’d harbor such, and thus it would be me

The mirrored being took a seat; looked me straight into my eyes

She watched me closely in her stare, and straightened her demise

She said, for once be true to self and you will have a clue

Of the beauty of the spirit and what is uniquely you

Do not be afraid to be what you know is deep within your soul

Release the fears of rejection, release the need to gain control

Dance with fairies in the night, sing lullabys with the moon

Walk in the rain in mornings, sleep till the afternoon

Speak your truths with love and passion;

Don’t do it just because you’ve heard its right…

And you will find the answers to the questions that haunt you in the night

But most of all my kindred one; you will find the light!

~By Cordieb. ~~~~~

Art Work Courtesy of Rick Mobbs

Reposted for Marie.  Mist can be tears, can be joy, can be blood, can be sweat, can be semen, can be love, can be hate, …can be whatever…what do you think men mist most?

This poem was written especially for Rick Mobbs at Mine Enemy Grows Older. Rick has been so kind to feature his beautiful work to inspire us to write each week. Due to other responsibilities, Rick has informed us that he will no longer be able to continue his beautiful art prompts. His latest beautiful piece is shown above. . . . I wrote this poem as an interpretation of the art .  .  . and  . . . how I imagine most men, including Rick, may feel . . . at times.

Like Spilt Milk – The Spirit of a Man ~Written by CordieB.

I hold the world with closed iron fists

Though others cry; I vaguely mist

My ego causes my heart to roar

Yet also causes my mist to pour . . . . like spilt milk wasting on the floor.

Instinctively I’m a territorial being…

Not into that which can’t be seen…

Though often I claim to see the light…

Most times I focus on black and white.

Beauty prompts my groin to soar…

Yet also causes my mist to pour. . . .like spilt milk reproducing more!

My thoughts so often unrealized…

Not even I can crystallize . . .

the myriad of issues– real or fantasized . . .

My triumphs cause my voice to roar

yet also cause my mist to pour. . . like spilt milk gushing out the door

My God chose me to oversee…

Why has earth’s fate been placed on me?

Should I choose peace; should I choose war?

Responsibilities cause my mind to explore . . .

yet also cause my mist to pour. . . like spilt milk crashing on the shore . . .

~Written for Rick Mobbs in response to his last visual arts prompt. . .

Photo derived from Showee and is licensed under a creative commons.

I was born long ago on a distant hillside by a beautiful shade tree

Or perhaps by a river under the sunset or on a sandy beach with a deep blue sea

I was created in bliss to demolish man’s selfish ways and give an alternate view of their false reality.

I was born in the eyes of a man and a woman; perchance Venus and Mars, or perhaps Adam and Eve.

Their first glances into each other’s translucent eyes released my spirit; set me free!

I gave them the spirit to bring forth life to new generations through each other;

I disguised the pain of intercourse into intense pleasure; oh! how they clung to each other!

I extended great cacoethes and courage like none they had ever known.

They actually wanted to help each other though all obstacles and life’s unknown!

I masked their selfishness so they would work together to overcome universal elements;

I was borne to enable them to combine there strengths; forget self-discriminates;

But I had been contained so long, that I lost control, as soon as their glances set me free.

I easily took over these poor humans’ hearts and minds and completely distorted their reality;

I wanted to test them and myself to see just how far I could take them; how strong I could be.

I found that I was limited by my father, time, and my mother, space, they soon tamed and admonished me!

Even today, my badness feels so good, it releases euphoric dopamine;

My power so intoxicating – I can be your worst enemy or your best friend;

My tales are so captivating, I can make a wrong man do right and a right woman do wrong.

So addictive is my essence, I can make one come home early or stay out all night long. (whew!)

Few have been able to resist me – once my flowery, opium-fragrant mist is inhaled;

I’m so irresistible – there are very few obstacles for which I can’t prevail;

I’ve provided inertia to win wars, climb mountains; cross many lands and seas;

I have the venomous poison of a serpent and the sweet sting of a thousand honeybees!

(oh my!)

I’m the secret to the fountain of youth; yet my fountain can be limited;

By the humdrum of ennui , my aforementioned parents and familiarity unlimited;

I build a tolerance of such – it takes more of me to keep my victims high;

Until I’m simply not enough to keep my subjects flying wildly into unlimited skies;

So they shed their wings and suddenly they fall from sister grace that kept them suspended;

In the clouds of unlimited possiblities. Sadly, their glorious illusionary trip has ended.

But if you’re smart or lucky, you’ll invite my oldest sister, love, into your heart;

She’s intelligent and compassionate, reality and illusion she easily distinguishes apart.

She embodies strength that’s enduring, though more supbtle than my dying passion;

She’s not a trend; she’s got class and opulence- her style is never out of fashion.

But if ever you need me to cultivate your desires, rejuvinate your passion, and negate your trust -

Close your eyes, take me in; devour me; but remember! in a few seasons I will turn into star dust;

Hopefully my loving and gracious sisters will save you from the emptiness I’ll leave upon your yearning bust;

I am the young, beautiful, and captivating, yet short lived sister of grace and love; I am (click below for answer)

the Spirit of Lust

By CordieB.

Let us drop the stones of revenge and try a new approach... forgiveness - by Anit@_M

 Now just because we forgive someone does not mean that we should allow anyone to continually hurt us. It means that we release them from the anger, resentment, and bitterness usually associated with an unforgiving spirit. It means that we love them, in spite of….. We love them whether they are in our lives or out of our lives…just like the father loves the prodigal son.  In order to conjure the spirit of forgiveness, we must first conjure the spirit of godly love and compassion. The spirit of godly love (agape) “compassionate love” will get us much further in our relationships than the spirit of being in love (eros) “passionate love.” You see in the spirit of eros love, with it’s swirling emotions and drama, we don’t actually actively love our beloved; rather, we find a desperate emotional need for our beloved to love us.  Although, the spirit of eros in a relationship is important, as it makes the relationship, exciting and exhilarating, these feelings ALWAYS dissipate unless they are accompanied by the spirit of agape love.

So if there is something that you feel unforgiving about your beloved today, try to summon the spirit of agape love and harness compassion, not only for your beloved, but also for yourself.    This is the spirit that 50-year old anniversaries are based upon!  You might be surprised how much better you will feel about your beloved, but even more so, about yourself!

Quote for the Day:   "There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love.” – Bryant H. McGill -

Later this week, I will give some ideas on harnessing the spirit of agape love….and I appreciate any input or comments you may have.  Until then…

Peace, Light and Love, CordieB.

Though my eyes were brown and yours were blue
We at first appreciated the differences in hue
Why they were different, we had no clue
But embraced the beauty, through and through

Then on that midnight starry night
The gods awakened, causing stress and fright
Fear was something we had never known
Whether close together or all alone

We had all we ever needed or ever would
We could achieve anything that ever could
But on that dark night, once upon
The gods became bored of creation . . .
And so the games of life begun . . .

"How can we make them not forsee
That they are one and all as we?
How can we make them entertain
If they know that all are one and one’s the same?"

And so the god of unimpressed
Purposed to put forth a simple test
No pain was known to men back then
It was invented to see how best
Two lives would deal, and who would win
Pain produced me; thus I produced what you call sin.

Sadly the test failed miserably
Soon you became you and I became me
And so the gods changed destiny…
of how life was suppose to be.

This spirit often called out of name
Whose first intent was to bear blame
To make you look at me as I
And question differences to why
We were not exactly both the same

This spirit questioned right from wrong
And high from low and short from long
Discarded the weak, embraced the strong;
And though we both stood side by side
And knew no thing of foolish pride
This spirit borne proudness so great
That pride turned quickly into hate

As pain was never in the original plan;
For any living creature, including man.
Back then we were much like the beautiful tree
Who gives all of herself and love just to be . . .
And co-create in God’s creativity….
No pain is felt by the morning glory
Who each morning tells a most lovely story
The grass is not pained by the trample of man
She embraces the walks on her bountiful land

I’m told the Creation God attempted to correct this aweful woe
By instilling in animals, knowledge of everything they’d ever need or know…
But most humans remained retarded in their abilities
To  see the the forest through the trees…
For despite having knowledge to eliminate pain’s dark shadow
Pain’s offspring remained, Who am I . . . (Click below for Riddle Answer)

I am the Ego

~By CordieB.

Freedom by  ~tatsu-subaru   ©2008-2009

There is a certain sadness one often feels when one has to relinquish control;

The sadness of a dying past…allowing the present to replace the old;

There is a certain anguish in realizing our grasp must be broken;

Like watching our children leave the nest…our real fears are seldom spoken…

Because we know that some of our desires die with our letting go;

But let go we must …in order that love ones can blossom and grow

So, our selfish motivations to hold our love ones near…

is often miscommunicated with sadness, anguish and fear…

If we truly love someone we must encourage them to be

Uniquely themselves by  ensuring they are free…

from our insecurity based limitations which may hinder their flight…

Open the window!  Allow love ones to find their true light!
~~Written by CordieB

The Measurement of a Man Lies in His Heart

When you can keep composure and know just what to do
While others are loosing theirs; while blaming it on you
When you can believe in self, when others say you can’t
Yet still love those others, regardless of negative affirmant

When you can remain patient without growing too weary of the wait
When you can make the best of dire circumstances  come what may
And realize your part; not blame others or blame fate
When being hated by others doesn’t cause you to practice hate
And evil deeds upon you is not dealt with in evil retaliate

When being lied about  doesn’t cause you to become a liar
and yet not believe or boast on being the the better or the wiser
When you can dream and not become a perpetual daydreamer
When you can solicit assistance without resorting to being a schemer
When you can think, while not being obsessed with your thoughts
When you can admit to mistakes without having been caught
When you can accept criticism without pointing fingers back
And not take all criticism as a personal attack
When you can summon courage in the mist of paralyzing fears
When you are not afraid to cry; as strength often comes with tears

When you can face disaster and triumph just the same
realizing they are one–just with a different name
When you can risk it all in the investment of a dream
loose it all; but not loose faith and start all over again
Keeping life in perspective, never bothering to complain

When you can walk in a crowd of evil, yet still keep your virtue
When you can not loose sight of the goodness within you
When you can have abundance, yet not forget from where you came
When you can be tied in bondage, yet your freedom still remains

When you can learn life’s lessons in all that come and go
Not ever falsely thinking you know all there is to know
When you can give all you can, still knowing when to say no
Realizing true friends count with you; not simply take and go

When you can give from the heart to those less fortune than self
And not measure richness on material wealth
When you can love, realizing love may not be returned the same
Then you shall possess a gift held in the heart of a real man
When you can realize the powers you so blessedly possess
Knowing with God’s Grace comes unique responsibilities
When you can converse with royalty with wisdom inner borne
And also communicate with beggars, realizing we are all of one
then life will start revealing light like a distant rising sun
And when you strive to master these truths, you shall be a man, my son

–Written especially for Sam, my wonderful son , pictured above.  Sam is 16.  I imagine you remember being 16 . . . no need to say more. . . lol

Inspired by Rudyard Kipling’s “If”

Some say I’m the most demonic-like spirit of all times;

I have been responsible for a many cacoethes crimes.

I’m the most wrathful spirit known to touch the hearts of men

If not put in check, I can cause all types of vengeful sin.

My rampant rage is likened to a storm weathered battered sea;

My face can become so distorted, you would not even recognize me.

I am red, blue hot; flaming fierier than hell in a forest fire;

I am truly not myself; and you know what?. . . the devil truly is a liar!

I am completely irrational; incoherrent, and out of control;

My emotional complexities reach down to the depths of the very soul;

Don’t come near me; don’t look at me, don’t dare say one word.

Because, I can only hear my own anger and my vision is blurred.

I’m sometimes tamed and charmed by sensual music; a little wine and dance;

But, If I were the object of my desire, I would not even take that chance.

My eyes are bloodshot red with a glimmer of green, and I tremble from inside;

There’s a thin line between love and hate; but it’s not love; perhaps hateful pride.

Whatever it is, take heed my love–for you have been forwarned!

Don’t touch me; Stay your distance; Run for cover, I am the spirit of . . . (Click below for the answer)

A Woman Scorned!  
By CordieB.

(If you said jealousy - I’ll accept that as a correct answer too)

But Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned!  

Woman, if you ever feel these emotions, listen to some music, because music has charms to soothe a savage beast .  Once you have calmed down, love yourself out of that relationship (unless you have that type of understanding with your man) and that’s cool too.  To each his or her own.   Remember, you are a diamond and men will only do what they know you will accept.   If you decide to take him back; remember, you have set the path, should he wander again.  Somewhere in the relationship, you have subconsciously put the idea in his head that you are accepting to this type of behavior.  Say what you mean, and mean what you say!  Period. 

Always remember, nothing real can be threatened, nothing unreal exists!  (A Course in Miracles)

Peace, Light and Love,

CordieB.

See also, All is Fair in Love and War – Or is it?  and/or 
An Early Rejection Usually Saves You From a Great Deal of Pain, Grief, and Heartache in the Long Run

Simply Tired, CordieB

This one might not sound very spiritual; but it is how I feel at this very moment; some of you may understand. 

You darkened my spirits; you hurt my soul

Now you don’t undestand why I’ve become so cold

You said you didn’t want me; not once; not twice

You played with my emotions like the roll of the dice

You chanced my love like a 10 cents bet

Now you looking sorry and full of regret

You put me out at your convenience

You thought I’d continue to put up with the nonsense

Although I am a diamond, you treated me like coal

Then on the Sabath day, that shit got old

See God told me in so many words

As a child of God; I won’t continue to hurt

He lighted my spirit; he quinched my soul

Now you understand why I’ve become so cold?